Grief during the holidays can feel overwhelming. The pressure to be festive, excited, and participate in traditions can sometimes feel more like a burden. During the holiday season, it’s important to acknowledge your grief and give yourself the space to heal. Take it one day at a time, and remember, you will get through this season.
Remember, It Is Okay To Feel All Feelings
The holiday season can introduce a new wave of unfamiliar emotions during the grieving process. You may have felt like you were improving until the holidays began approaching. Remember that grief is not linear, and it is okay to feel how you feel. No simple guidelines exist that will take away the hurt you are feeling or heal the grief you are experiencing during the holidays. The first step to navigating the holidays is to be compassionate with yourself and take it one stride at a time.
Talk About Your Grief
During the holiday season, don’t be afraid to express your grief. Ignoring your grief won’t make the pain go away and talking about it openly often makes you feel better. Your family and loved ones want to support you! By sharing your experiences, you can open up conversation and might learn that others feel similarly to you. Sharing how you feel allows you to move forward, and it’s okay to allow others to help with these big emotions, even during the holidays. Whether you choose to share with loved ones or seek out a therapist, acknowledging your grief, talking through your feelings, and focusing on hope can help you continue to heal during a difficult season.
It can also be healing to speak your loved one’s name. Bring up the person you’ve lost in holiday conversations. Sharing their name can encourage others to acknowledge your need to remember someone who was a significant part of your life.
Honor Your Limits
Well-meaning friends and family often try to prescribe what is good for you during the holidays. Instead of going along with their plans, focus on what you want and need. Feelings of loss will probably leave you fatigued. Your low energy level may naturally slow you down. Respect what your body and mind are telling you. And lower your own expectations about being at your peak during the holiday season. You may already feel stressed, so don’t overextend yourself. Avoid isolating yourself, but be sure to recognize the need to have special time for yourself. Realize that merely “keeping busy” won’t distract you from your grief but may increase stress and postpone the need to talk out thoughts and feelings related to your grief.
Surround Yourself With Loved Ones
Identify friends and relatives who understand that the holiday season can increase your sense of loss and who will allow you to talk openly about your feelings. Having encouragement and comfort from individuals can help you share the burden of loss. Whether you choose to participate in a holiday tradition or would rather not talk and watch a movie, have people join you. Navigating grief does not need to be a journey you do alone but a time to lean on others for support.
Embrace Treasured Memories
Memories are one of the best legacies left after the death of a loved one. Holidays always make you think about past memories and traditions. Instead of ignoring these memories, share them with your family and friends. Keep in mind that memories can bring both happiness and sadness. If your memories bring laughter, smile. If your memories bring sadness, express that sadness. Memories are made in love and are meant to be felt.
Gerst Resources
At Gerst, we want to help in every step of the grieving process. From preplanning to guiding you through funeral arrangements and offering resources for coping with loss, we’re by your side. We are here to help guide you through this chapter in your life. The other side of grief is bright, and you will get there at your own unique pace.
